Feeling overwhelmed and want calm. Take a seat.
If you are a high achieving woman feeling overwhelmed with the weight of all you have to do and the different roles you have to play every day, then this is for you.
I’ve been in your shoes. I’ve sat with my head in my hands, crying and scared not knowing what to do and shutting everyone out for fear they’d find out how burnt out I was. Listening to Gary Vee at this point will be the worst thing that you can do. You don’t need the hustle. You don’t need to push and keep up the grind. You aren’t able to give anymore.
Not until you have some peace, some calm and some clarity, and even then who says you have to do it that way.
That’s why I am here. I’m here to tell you there is a way forward. You can stop wearing the busy badge of honour. You can stop the hamster wheel. You can feel good about you again. You will take bold steps in the future but now, right now, we need to take care of you. We need to help you bounce back from these feelings of overwhelm, of lack, of resentment. READ MORE to find the steps.
I was guest speaking at a Women in business event recently and was asked to discuss the topic of Organisation. It’s a big issue for many women, the feeling that they aren’t organised, or that they can’t organise themselves, because of the volume of activities they are juggling and it makes them feel at their worst. As always there is a matter of perspective to take into account and the stories we tell ourselves.
This is playing out with my daughter at the moment and I am committed to using my words carefully with her when the issue arises. In school, she’s had many teachers tell her she is disorganised and she now says it herself. ‘I’m just not an organised person mum.’ ‘I forgot to put my homework in my bag and I got a behaviour point. I’m so disorganised.’ Recently, she received behaviour points and a detention for it, which reaffirms her negative self-talk. I’m not saying that she shouldn’t have a detention, but I know that to help her become more organised, and believe that she can be more organised, it will take more than the pain of the detention to create good habits and increase self- esteem around something that does not come naturally to her.
When I talk to her I explain how I am not ‘naturally’ a methodical person, or an organised person but I see the benefits in being more organised and how it can help me feel better when I am, so I work daily on being as organised as I can be. It helps bring BEST me out to play. Sometimes I am very organised, other times I drop a ball, but I consciously aim to be more organised and so I am, more often than not. Rather than adopting the label ‘I am disorganised’ I tell myself ‘I am someone who is committed to being more organised.’ There is a big difference and I want her to see herself this way too. A girl who is committed to being more organised, in order to help BEST me come out to play.
This was clear when I spoke to many of the women at the presentation, I heard them say to ladies around them, ‘I’m not organised.’ giving themselves a label and, ‘I’ve so much on it’s impossible to be organised.’ demonstrating their limiting belief. A big part of feeling overwhelmed is the feeling that everything is out of control, so when working with clients there are 3 key areas we look at to see where these feelings stem from and making often tiny changes that will impact on this feeling of disorganisation in a big way. Read on .......
On September 7th my dad was bringing in the washing as it had started to rain and slipped. According to the surgeon he must have gone down ‘like a tree’ (The irony of this simile didn’t escape me).He banged the back of head with such force that he effectively snapped the bones in his neck in 3 places and suffered a spinal compression. Within minutes, life as we knew it turned upside down.
After an incredible 7 hour operation, performed by an amazing team at Walton Neurological Centre, we spent the next 5 or 6 days at the hospital around the clock as a family. Not sure whether he’d pull through, or not, had us all on an emotional rollercoaster I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Loop the loop in fact. Eventually, he started to make progress and as they lifted the sedation and gave him a tracheostomy, we started to feel more optimistic that he’d pull through.
Two and a half months on we’ve survived the early shock and as he has moved to Southport Spinal Unit a couple of weeks ago and we are now living a new norm. A norm where we have a rota to visit dad and give him the support he needs, whilst trying not to tire him out (or ourselves for that matter). The future of his mobility is still uncertain, but there are some positive signs, so having gone from living a day at a time, we are feeling like we can live a week at a time now.
So, why am I telling you this?
Well, as always I want to be real. I want to show you that life happens and it’s how we deal with it that matters. So, here’s what I’ve learnt so far from this situation. Read on ....
You went into business wanting to be flexible and have personal freedom that allows you to pivot and be creative in ways that you just weren’t able to do when you were working for someone else.
Am I right?
As an entrepreneur you are highly motivated, you love starting new projects and you love creating new things. These are great qualities; however, if you have a ‘Secret Squirrel’ in your business this can cause you problems.
I love nothing more than watching the red squirrels that visit my big oak tree. They run here, there, everywhere. They find acorns, they bury them. They get distracted by the two magpies that come to stand guard and then they forget where they put that nut! They jump from branch to branch and run up and down the tree using up huge amounts of energy. Is that happening to you? Read on
As I was hugging Steph and Jen for the first time, I was so excited because this is what Bizmums is about. Making connections and doing business in a way that feels good and fun. The Annual Conference and Awards, sponsored by 90 Days of Social, is the highlight of the Bizmums calendar as it’s a chance to finally meet people who you know as a thumbnail head from Facebook and can finally chat and hug in the flesh.
You’ll know I was nominated for 5 Awards and I was gobsmacked when I was shortlisted for all 5 so October 8th at the Manor House, Alsager was an exciting day for me on so many levels.
The day began with the fabulous Michelle Childs and Stacey Knight Jones leading us in a rousing, full room sing-a-long to Robbie’s “I Love my life.” (We were definitely better at the chorus than the verses!! LOL) Read on .......