I ask because over the last few years I have noticed that there can be little awareness around how we are managing our days, and in extreme cases, our lives. Life sort of runs away with itself and we are conditioned to believe it has to be hard work and a struggle to get the things that we want, i.e. the material things that we want and in pursuing that we lose sight of the other priorities we have that might make us feel successful. Don't get me wrong I'm not saying the material things don't have a value, I love a new coat, makes me feel great and having a beautiful home enhances my life, but in order to achieve all this we can lose sight of some of the simpler things that bring us happiness.
People drift from task to task, and whilst on the surface they are prioritising, in reality they are fire fighting or responding to whoever shouts at them loudest (be that a client, a boss, a child or a partner) and their energy is chaotic and fueled on high carb, sugar filled food or caffeine and at the end of an exhausting day they crash. They are snappy and irritable with the people they love, some drown that out with wine or more food, until the whole cycle starts again the next day.
What I love about the clients I work with is that they are ready for change. They know that this isn’t the way they want to live life and they are ready to do something about it. So, where to start. Read On........
I see you sat with a To Do List as long as your arm, and your leg. Not enough hours in the day to tackle all that needs to happen and all the while you are sinking deeper and deeper into listening to that Mean Little Cow voice (the inner critic) who is telling you that you are disorganised, dizzy and indecisive.
WRONG!! You’ve simply got too much volume and you need to turn it down.
Try this process and see how much better you feel and in control of what you are doing. Read on.....
Feeling overwhelmed and want calm. Take a seat.
If you are a high achieving woman feeling overwhelmed with the weight of all you have to do and the different roles you have to play every day, then this is for you.
I’ve been in your shoes. I’ve sat with my head in my hands, crying and scared not knowing what to do and shutting everyone out for fear they’d find out how burnt out I was. Listening to Gary Vee at this point will be the worst thing that you can do. You don’t need the hustle. You don’t need to push and keep up the grind. You aren’t able to give anymore.
Not until you have some peace, some calm and some clarity, and even then who says you have to do it that way.
That’s why I am here. I’m here to tell you there is a way forward. You can stop wearing the busy badge of honour. You can stop the hamster wheel. You can feel good about you again. You will take bold steps in the future but now, right now, we need to take care of you. We need to help you bounce back from these feelings of overwhelm, of lack, of resentment. READ MORE to find the steps.
I was guest speaking at a Women in business event recently and was asked to discuss the topic of Organisation. It’s a big issue for many women, the feeling that they aren’t organised, or that they can’t organise themselves, because of the volume of activities they are juggling and it makes them feel at their worst. As always there is a matter of perspective to take into account and the stories we tell ourselves.
This is playing out with my daughter at the moment and I am committed to using my words carefully with her when the issue arises. In school, she’s had many teachers tell her she is disorganised and she now says it herself. ‘I’m just not an organised person mum.’ ‘I forgot to put my homework in my bag and I got a behaviour point. I’m so disorganised.’ Recently, she received behaviour points and a detention for it, which reaffirms her negative self-talk. I’m not saying that she shouldn’t have a detention, but I know that to help her become more organised, and believe that she can be more organised, it will take more than the pain of the detention to create good habits and increase self- esteem around something that does not come naturally to her.
When I talk to her I explain how I am not ‘naturally’ a methodical person, or an organised person but I see the benefits in being more organised and how it can help me feel better when I am, so I work daily on being as organised as I can be. It helps bring BEST me out to play. Sometimes I am very organised, other times I drop a ball, but I consciously aim to be more organised and so I am, more often than not. Rather than adopting the label ‘I am disorganised’ I tell myself ‘I am someone who is committed to being more organised.’ There is a big difference and I want her to see herself this way too. A girl who is committed to being more organised, in order to help BEST me come out to play.
This was clear when I spoke to many of the women at the presentation, I heard them say to ladies around them, ‘I’m not organised.’ giving themselves a label and, ‘I’ve so much on it’s impossible to be organised.’ demonstrating their limiting belief. A big part of feeling overwhelmed is the feeling that everything is out of control, so when working with clients there are 3 key areas we look at to see where these feelings stem from and making often tiny changes that will impact on this feeling of disorganisation in a big way. Read on .......
On September 7th my dad was bringing in the washing as it had started to rain and slipped. According to the surgeon he must have gone down ‘like a tree’ (The irony of this simile didn’t escape me).He banged the back of head with such force that he effectively snapped the bones in his neck in 3 places and suffered a spinal compression. Within minutes, life as we knew it turned upside down.
After an incredible 7 hour operation, performed by an amazing team at Walton Neurological Centre, we spent the next 5 or 6 days at the hospital around the clock as a family. Not sure whether he’d pull through, or not, had us all on an emotional rollercoaster I wouldn’t wish on anyone. Loop the loop in fact. Eventually, he started to make progress and as they lifted the sedation and gave him a tracheostomy, we started to feel more optimistic that he’d pull through.
Two and a half months on we’ve survived the early shock and as he has moved to Southport Spinal Unit a couple of weeks ago and we are now living a new norm. A norm where we have a rota to visit dad and give him the support he needs, whilst trying not to tire him out (or ourselves for that matter). The future of his mobility is still uncertain, but there are some positive signs, so having gone from living a day at a time, we are feeling like we can live a week at a time now.
So, why am I telling you this?
Well, as always I want to be real. I want to show you that life happens and it’s how we deal with it that matters. So, here’s what I’ve learnt so far from this situation. Read on ....